That's Hot

The blood is pumping - the tears are flowing

2005-03-05T22:10:00.000-05:00

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My senses have been dulled the past few weeks. More like a deer in the headlights adjusting to my new job. My life has been nothing but work lately. Working full time, studying for a final and training for an upcoming physical fitness test. My house has been neglected during this time as well. Now that I had finished my final, I wanted to be as productive as possible over the weekend. My father in-law came over at 8:00am to pick up my husband for bike week. Half of me was embarrassed at the mess but the other half was just content. (I normally would be 100% embarrassed.)

After they left I decided to catch up on my recorded shows that I had been neglecting. I did run a couple of errands so I wasn’t completely useless. But when I came back, I didn’t start a load of laundry. Instead I played with Noise and took a nap.

But this was just a prelude to the real excitement. Because you see, nothing gets my blood pumping more than a romantic love story in the form of a movie. I had been dying to watch this movie during these busy last few weeks but couldn’t afford the time. So today was the day. This was a wonderful movie. Most love stories don’t get good till the end but this one was magnificent throughout. I almost ran out of tissues it was so good.

My husband thinks he has to comfort me every time I get mushy during a movie. So by the end of the movie, my husband had his arms wrapped around me with Noise in the middle. “Stop crying” my husband said “or you’re going to make me cry” (which I’ve never seen him do). “What’s wrong with that” I said. “I’m ruff and rugged and men don’t cry” he says. Then he said “Hey Princess, don’t ride my ass unless you’re going to pull my hair.” This is his new favorite saying he picked up from bike week. “Thanks for killing it” I said.

So after a long and dull past couple of weeks, the crying never felt so good.

“The Notebook” is my new favorite movie.

I have a new job! (But I feel like a jackass)

2005-02-09T20:58:00.000-05:00

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Finally, after a long, grueling, un-optimistic search I received not one but two job offers! A human resources/bank director’s assistant position for BankFirst and a Recruiting Coordinator position with Cendant, who owns Fairfield resorts and Trendwest. The later had much more to offer than the first.

Flashback (Before Cendant offered me a position)

I wanted the job with Cendant so bad that I would have been devastated if they had decided not to hire me.

It had been two days now since BankFirst called and offered me a position and the clock was ticking. I had told them I would have an answer by today at 5:00. Cendant said they would have their decision by 4:00. At 4:00 I called Cendant. The recruiter explains that the VP was pulled into a meeting so the decision is being delayed but will be made today. So I waited. It is now 4:55 so I call Cendant again. "I'm in the middle of a phone screen, I'll call you back in five minutes." OMG!

In a bind, I call my husband. He sighs and tells me to accept the position with BankFirst.

The HR and Bank director were thrilled and doused me compliments of what a great candidate I was. I acted happy even though they weren't my first choice. I hung up hoping that I had not made a big mistake.

Cendant then calls with the opening line of “I hope we’re not too late.” Gee how axiomatic. (They knew of my deadline) The recruiter apologized saying she had lost my number. I was disappointed about the situation but was glad they had decided to hire me. She suggested that I call BankFirst right away and decline their offer. But I had just gotten off the phone with them acting very excited. I sighed and cringed. I felt terrible. But it had to be done.

I called BankFirst “I know I just accepted your offer but dah dah dah and they have better opportunity for advancement dah dah dah” Her: (sigh) “I understand.” I apologized and told her how bad I felt. (I ended up sending them flowers apologizing that I was sorry I could not accept there offer)

This was Friday and I still feel like a jackass five days later.

Spa II - Maxx

2005-01-24T15:43:00.000-05:00

Well the second part of my Spa day was even more enjoyable than the first. (again most men will differ) After my nudist encounter, I grabbed my cell phone and went outside to the pool area which I had completely to myself and called my husband. I tell him about my experience and his first question is “is the spa coed?” I said yes but both sexes have their own whirlpool. “Okay, still not interested in going to the spa” he says. Anyway, I then sit in the outdoor whirlpool to relax. I had to pee and since no one was around,..you guessed it. I whizzed in the whirlpool. I usually don’t whiz in public pools especially if other people are around but I figured the chlorine would surely kill it by the time someone got in. I then called QueenBean to tell her and she said she was really having a crappy day and wished she was there with me. So she agreed to finally come with me the next time. (Yay I got spa buddy,..Yaahhy)

I then went to the Spa café and ate an amazing lunch outside (they always have the best health food). By this time, I needed to get ready for my next appointment, my hair. So I take a shower, donn (military term meaning put on) my robe and head toward the salon.

I had picked the most expensive hair stylist they have, Maxx at $120.00. I don’t recall ever spending this much on hair before but wanted to know what $120.00 would look like. Maxx turns out to be an attractive gay Asian male. We hit it off. “You’re giving me goose bumps” he said often. He spent like an hour and 20 minutes on my hair, mostly because we were bonding and having a great time. A few of the girls in the hair salon were also close friends with Maxx and he introduced me and I felt like I could really click with them as well. He even showed me pictures of his dog that he took with his cell phone after I told him about Noise. I told him that I’ve been wanting to check out Paris Hilton’s new club and so we agreed to go together and I insisted that his other “fag hags” come with us. So I’m excited needless to say. P.S. I loved the way he did my hair!

Now talk about service. When I was ready to leave, I went to the café to get one of their delicious smoothies. It was closed so I went to the check out counter of the Spa and told them my dilemma. She ordered one from room service for me and walked all the way inside the hotel to pick it up and bring it back for me. Oh how I love the Ritz Carlton Spaaa…

Spa part I - C cups in my face

2005-01-24T11:14:00.000-05:00

So I went to the Spa this weekend, by myself :(, and had an interesting time. I brought my accounting book with me so I would have something productive to read. I arrive in a great mood because like I said before, this place is heaven. I get into my robe and slide on my slippers. Go to the lounge area with my book and hot tea and begin to relax while I await my massage. I am told that Henry is my massage therapist today. I hope he is not as feminine as the last one I think to myself. “Ms. Breiding” a semi-feminine voice calls. Oh great so much for that idea I think. I do like gay guys a lot as friends but is it too much to ask to have a straight one as your massage therapist? Anyway, it turns out that I had a great time conversing with Henry. So it made up for the fact that he wasn’t as masculine as I would have liked him to be.

After the massage, I changed into my bathing suit (important piece of information as you’ll soon find out) and got into the indoor whirlpool. There was an older woman also in the whirlpool that didn’t seem interested in socializing. So I just leaned my head back and closed my eyes to relax. I hear someone getting in, so I lift my head up and open my eyes to a beautiful nude, “busty” female entering the whirlpool. I quickly look at the ceiling pretending to relax but my eyebrows would not quit moving as thoughts were racing around my head like “did I just see what I thought I just saw”, “is this allowed”, “what should I do”, “where should I look”. Just then a second female enters the whirlpool in the buff. Apparently the two nudists, both about 23 years old are good friends and start giggling and conversing with each other. In case you were wondering, I would of considered these girls 10’s. Less than a minute later the older woman gets out of the whirlpool, leaving just me with the two naked chicks. I think to myself how my husband so wishes he was me at this moment. Should I talk to them? I answered my own question with an answer that most males would probably disagree with. I stereotyped the two as dancers or at least girls with the mentality of porn stars and concluded that I would not have anything in common with them. So despite what my husband would of wanted me to do (take their picture or something) I ended up getting out. As I was walking away, I heard one say “well we scared them two off.” The worse part about it, is that I had a dream last night where I was in some sort of competition with other girls. All of us had robes on, like at the spa, but one of the girls was competing with her robe open and in my mind was winning the competition. Anyway, just when I thought nothing could shock or effect me, something does.

I'm so spoiled!

2005-01-17T10:39:00.000-05:00

OMG I’m so spoiled! For Valentines day I wanted to stay at Disney’s Animal Kingdom Lodge. Why? Because you can go and just sit on your balcony and watch the animals in this savanna type setting. How relaxing!, right? It also has an arcade in the hotel which my husband and I will make good use of, one of the best restaurants and an amazing pool area complete with water park type slides. I don’t know if it’s heated so that will probably be one thing we won’t get to experience being February and all. I’ve also noticed that the lodge always receives great ratings from previous guests. I’ve been wanting to stay there for a long time and thought this would be the perfect opportunity to do so. So why am I spoiled? Well my mother and sister in law both work for Disney and get a pretty decent discount on Disney hotels. Since the room we wanted is originally priced at $280, it would be reasonable after the discount. Well it turns out that the standard room that we wanted was all booked for that night. However the deluxe was available for $340. But my mother in law can’t get a discount on the deluxe rooms. So I was feeling a little bummed but then Jeremy asks well that’s where you want to go right? I said yes but that’s too much for a room. He replies “nothing is too much for my princess” and gets it anyway at full price which was like $379 with all the ridiculous hotel tax we have here! I was siked. Jeremy’s excited about the room too. He thinks he will be able to stand on the balcony and take a leak on a zebra. He also says he wants to show the animals how to get their freak on. I assured him that they don’t need a demonstration.

Ode to Noise

2005-01-14T15:30:00.000-05:00

I cannot neglect writing about the new love in my life, Noise. Noise is my new half poodle, half Maltese, 11lb dog. Yes, like Paris Hilton, I too cherish a little fuzz ball. I treat her just like I would a human baby. I carry and hold her often. She sleeps with my husband and I. She sits on my lap while watching TV, and follows me around like a little shadow. Did I mention she is incredibly cute! In Florida we have these little things called lizards. They are usually 2-3 inches long and fast. Noise’s favorite thing to do is attempt to catch one each time she goes potty. And yes, my brother has witnessed her eating one. Of course I cheer her on each time I witness a chase. I can tell she gets immense joy from it. My husband also loves her equally as much. We would be heart broken if something happened to her. I’ve bought 5 outfits for her thus far. She does love to wear clothes. I admit this is all really embarrassing but at the same time it gives me so much joy that I wouldn’t have it any other way. I LOVE YOU NOISE!!! YOU ADORABLE LITTLE FLUFF BALL YOU!!!

Fridays

2005-01-14T14:08:00.000-05:00

Fridays are supposed to be happy, filled with enthusiasm and laughter. Well this Friday has been rainy, full of let downs and boredom. One of our at-home coworkers graced us with her presence today complete with her 3 sons. (Aged b/w 4 months and 10 years.) Out of sheer desperation to entertain myself, which I often do quite well. I sneakily handed a perfume bottle to the middle aged son and whispered “spray mommy with this.”

Side note: Why do I consistently use children to my amusement? I’m sure that will cease when I have my own.

Anyway, he decides it would be more amusing to spray his older brother instead. And so for the next 10 minutes the older one is running from the younger around the loop in our office. The younger one yelling with that ear piercing screech that little kids do so well “You’re a girl!” and laughing hysterically. The mother/employee was also yelling “Stop that right now!” Some would find this annoying, but not me. I was rolling in my chair watching the chaos occur. I love being the instigator, that is my part-time job you know ;). Ahh, Fridays. :)

To Spa or not to Spa?

2005-01-13T20:28:00.000-05:00

Me, heavy metal, red wine and my computer – it’s a beautiful thing. So to spa or not to spa this weekend? I still have yet to find a spa buddy. Someone else who can afford the luxury to prance around the Ritz Carlton with. Any takers? Maybe you need convincing. Imagine heaven. Now imagine heaven with a private pool, whirlpool, sauna, and steam room. Not to mention a fitness facility with instructed classes, great café and valet parking. Now imagine this along with any massage, facial and body treatment you can think of. Even a hair salon! Must I go on?! Well you wear nothing but a robe and slippers all day drinking complementary teas, sodas and coffees. Uhhh…I think I just had an orgasm.

Beautiful Day

2005-01-13T13:35:00.000-05:00

It’s a beautiful day here in sunny Orlando. As I was walking back to the office from lunch, I had to convince my self that playing hookie to go to the park and lie under a tree would not be beneficial to my career. Luckily, my office has a window, and oh is that breeze welcoming. No, this is actually much better than going to the park. Since now I can enjoy the fresh air, blog and get paid in doing so. Work. Yes that’s a controversial term here. Yes I do get paid and I do do some work. But the goal here is to do the least amount of work as possible and the most amount of screwing off as possible while on the clock to take full advantage of the employers that have done us wrong for so long. It’s only fair. Currently the Boss and the Boss’s wife are off to a deposition for one of many numerous law suites against them. Meanwhile, I am here, unsupervised, with my French vanilla coffee and a nice breeze. Let’s be optimistic about having a crummy job and say could life be any better at this moment? I think not.

Please welcome Mrs. Java the Hut, my acctg professor

2005-01-13T11:17:00.000-05:00

Is it too much to ask that a professor be somewhat entertaining? I had my first class meeting last night for accounting at the graduate level and the professor is an overweight older than the hills female who knows next to nothing about how to operate the technical equipment in the classroom and seems to think everyone is as computer illiterate as she is. “Now when you click on this link it will open in a new window so you can close it without closing out of WebCT!” Wow! Really!? I would have never been able to figure out the workings of internet explorer if you hadn’t enlightened me with your 55 yr old intelligence! Can you get to the subject please so I don’t demand these two hours of my life back! She explained every single little moronic detail throughout the class. PURE TORTURE, I MEAN COMEONE!! Some Indian guy asked me at the end of class what I thought. I explained my pain and responds with “She’s easy to understand, I think I should be able to get an A.” Hmm…I think. Either I’m more intelligent then these two nitwits combined or it’s A.D.D. In my last class (Statistical Methods) I thought the professor was highly intelligent and extremely entertaining. I aced the class. Is this the type of instruction I require to do well in a course? Do I really have eke...attention deficit disorder? I’m shuttering thinking about all the un-wanted time I am going to have to put into this class. Should I subject myself to watching the double chin jiggle about during instruction or self teach when attendance voluntary? HELP!

Intro

2005-01-13T11:16:00.000-05:00

I think blogging will be the outlet that I’ve been searching for all along that has been under my nose for years but never this clear before. It was just recently after watching the Sopranos that I contemplated how great it would be to see a therapist. Well I think blogging could be the answer.